--=== THE CHURCH OF ELVIS ===--

Preface and Preamble:

"If there is any fixed star in our constitutional constellation, it is that NO official, high or petty, can prescribe what shall be orthodox in politics, nationalism, religion or other matters of opinion or force citizens to confess by word or act their faith therein. If there ARE any circumstances which permit an exception, they do not now occur to us."

Ref: U.S.Supreme Court 1943 West Virginia State Board of Education v. Barnette, 319 US 624.

                      XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
                   "XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXV,,.
                "/XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX",
              ,"XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX  XXXXXXXXXXXXXX",
             ,"XXXX//        /X/    //////XXXXXXXXXXX",
           ,"XXXXXXX  XXXX   XXXX  XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX"",
           XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX",
          XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX",
         /XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXV,
        /"XXXXXXXXXXX X X   XXXXX  XX XX       XXXXXXXXXXXXXV,
        /"XXX X X X XXX X  X   XXX   X XX    XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXV,
        /"XXX X X X XXX X XX  X XX    XXXXX   XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXV,
        /"XXX XX XX XXXX XXXX XX XX  XXXX    XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXV,
        /,XXXX XX X XX X X X XXX XX   XXXXX XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXV,
        //XXX  XXX X XXXX XX   X       XX X XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXV,
        //XXX  XXX X XXXXX XX           XXXX XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXV,
         /XX   XXX X XXXXXX XX           XXXX  XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXV
         /XX     XXXXX  XXX X             XXXX XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXV
         /XX      XXXXX   XXX               XXX   XXXXXXXXXXXXXV,
        //XX       XXXXX    XX               XX   XXXXXXXXXXXXXV,
        //XX         XXXX    XX                X   XXXXXXXXXXXXV,
        //X            XXX    X                    XXXXXXXXXXXXXV
         /X              XX                         XXXXXXXXXXXXV
         /X                     ,,,,,XXXXXXX,,       XXXXXXXXXXXV
         /XXXXXXXXXX,         "XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX      XXXXXXXXXXXV
         /X"        ""                        ""     XXXXX    XXV
          H ,""""""""",,        ,"""""""""",,        XXXX    XXX
          "   ""   """ /          ""     ""          XXXX /  XX
          "      "    //                             XXX //  XX
          "           //                             XXX  /  XX
           "          //                            /XXX /  XX
           "          //                            /XXX    XX
           "         ///                            /XXX / XXX
           "        ///          ,,                /XXXXXXXXX
           "        //           /                /XXXXXXXXXX
            "         """  ""                    /XXXXXXXXX/  "
             ",       ,,,, ,,,,                                  ,
              "     ""IIII IIIIIIII"",               // /     /  "
               "       """"""""""""  "                //     /    "
                "      ,         ,"              // /     //       "
                "       "IIIWWIII"           //  // /      /     / ",
                 "         """"            ///   / /      /    / / ",
              //  "                      ////  // /     /       //  "
             //    "                    ////  / /    //         / "",
           //   /   ",                  "// /  /    /         //    "
         //    /     ",               //////  /   //         //     "
        //      /      ",               // //    //         //    """
     //        / ""    "    "       ""///     /        //      "    "
    //        //  ""   ""         "/ /      /       //              "
   //           ",  ","",       ","   /    //      //              ""

ELVIS thinks you're NEAT!

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%
%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%
%%%                                                               %%%
%%%       U N I V E R S A L      L I F E      C H U R C H         %%%
%%%       International Headquarters * Modesto California         %%%
%%%                                                               %%%
%%%                                                               %%%
%%%       It is hereby declared that     ELVIS ARON PRESLEY       %%%
%%%                                                               %%%
%%%       has been named         S A I N T            of the      %%%
%%%                                                               %%%
%%%       Universal Life Church this day of November 8, 1988      %%%
%%%                                                               %%%
%%%                                                               %%%
%%%        U L C                                                  %%%
%%%       S E A L        Signed: Kirby J. Hensley, D.D.           %%%
%%%        I H Q                 President                        %%%
%%%                                                               %%%
%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%
%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

Upon duly submitted and approved petition to the International Headquarters of the Universal Life Church, Inc., Elvis Aron Presley was named Saint of the Universal Life Church in November, 1988. The petition to the church read as follows:

Elvis exhibited faith and hope when, as a youngster, he pursued his talent as an entertainer despite the odds against rising from his humble beginnings. He exhibited charity by his obvious and documented generosity. All of these attributes of character are believed to have been present to an extraordinary degree by his followers.

******************************************************************************

ECCLESIASTICAL PROCLAMATION

WHEREAS the beliefs on matters of death and resurrection are especially promulgated during the weekend of the First Sunday after the first full moon after the Vernal Equinox, and

WHEREAS these concepts are so closely tied by many in many churches to ancient ceremonies of fertility and symbolized by Bunnies and Eggs and other esoteric symbols of rebirth and new life, and

WHEREAS the promise of eternal life was extended to everyone as far back as 1939 (or even earlier, to hear some tell it) and that possibility is recognized by lots of folks, and

WHEREAS the Saturday prior to the Sunday mentioned above has heretofore remained generally unclaimed, unnamed, and uncelebrated, now,

THEREFORE BE IT PROCLAIMED that the Saturday before the First Sunday after the first full moon after the Vernal Equinox be proclaimed and known as ELVIS SATURDAY from this day forward, and be celebrated by the faithful in joyous recognition of all Spring Festivals associated with rebirth and fertility with the eternal melodies of St. Elvis Aron Presley, who lives forever in the eternal present.

Wherefore I have set my mark and caused to be affixed the seal of the Church of Elvis ULC on this 14th day of April, 1990.

/s/ The Bishop.

Saturday, April 14, 1990

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THERE's MORE!!!

The CHURCH OF ELVIS is a sect of the Universal Life Church and is looking for new ministers.

ABOUT MINISTERHOOD

-- Is This For Real?

Yes, it is. The Universal Life Church will ordain anyone, for life, no questions asked, and at no cost. The ordination is legally valid, and, after registering with local authorities, ULC Ministers can legally perform weddings, funerals, baptisms, etc.

-- But I Have To Believe In Something Silly, Right?

Nope. The ULC doesn't impose ANY beliefs on it's Ministers or their congregations. Your god is OK. Period.

-- Am I Making Any Promises?

Only one. A ULC Minister agrees to do what's "right". You get to interpret "right" to your satisfaction. No one will call to ask for money. You're not joining a "cult." You're welcome (encouraged!) to continue practicing whatever faith you like. ULC Ministers are also Catholics, Episcopalians, Methodists, ELVIS Worshipers... you name it.

-- So How Do I Become Ordained?

Easy. Just Click Here and fill out the form. It's Free!

-- Still A Little Wary?

There's more information on the ULC all over the place. Look around. Check it out.

The net has lots of ULC Ministers from all walks of life. Join us!

--------------------------------------------------------------------

A Certified True Copy of the original certificate of Sainthood issued under the seal of the Church of Elvis ULC, and signed by the Pastor and the Prophet of Elvis is available, along with a copy of the Proclamation of Elvis Saturday, if requested, for a $5 donation payable to

Universal Life Church
and mailed to

Church of Elvis 
PO Box 67041
Baton Rouge LA 70896-7041

------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Special Title of Sainthood

Do you know a "Saint" personally? Do you know someone who has exercised the three theological virtues - faith, hope, and charity - to an extraordinary degree? If so you may bestow "Sainthood" within the ULC upon this beloved person. Merely write with your reasons for bestowing Sainthood upon the individual and include a donation of $5.00. The handsome certificate of Sainthood will be sent directly to you, or you may have the degree sent to the recipient.

Distributed by The Church of Elvis

CompuChurch International Headquarters

Archdiocese of Cyberspace

PO Box 67041
Baton Rouge LA 70896-7041

--=== THE CHURCH OF ELVIS ===--